So, we started to discuss how our human nature struggles with understanding and living that kind of love; Love not based on performance, but simply based on choice! We as human beings are so used to the idea of loving, particularly when it's easy, when you do everything we want you to do the way we want you to do it. In return we give praise and approval as reinforcement of that type of behavior. But, when you don't necessarily conform to our expectations or liking, we have no problem illustrating our dislike or disapproval, which is still a form of reinforcement. Unfortunately, this mentality shapes the way we operate in complete contrast to God's unchanging ways. He may not like everything we do, but it doesn't change or affect His love or approval of us one bit! Period! End of discussion!
This is how I know. As omniscient as God is, if His love was based on our performance, we would have been hopelessly doomed to hell a long time ago. Instead, because He knew that we were humanly incapable of paying such a great penalty, God's love motivated Him to sacrifice His only son, Jesus Christ, to die on the cross for our sins, in order to reconcile us back to Him. We could have never done that on our own. On top of that, He sent Jesus to die for our sins, WHILE WE WERE STILL SINNERS! Not that we did anything to deserve it, not that we performed to a certain standard, not that we conformed to some checklist to make ourselves worthy....but simply because He chose to express His love in that manner. All we have to do to take our place in the body of Christ is BELIEVE in our hearts and CONFESS with our mouths that the Lord Jesus Christ did die on the cross for our sins and God raised him from the dead so that we may have eternal life with our Heavenly Father.
So let's think about this....If it wasn't because of anything I did or a particular task I performed that motivated God to die for my sins, while I was still a sinner....then what could I possibly do to make Him stop loving me?... I mean really think about it. When He died on the cross for my sins (all of them, not just some of them) while I was still in an unrighteous state, this act of love was done in complete fulfillment of His plan to reconcile His creation back to Him. What I mean is, it is irreversible. There's nothing anyone can do to negate it. It's been done. It is complete. It is finished. Period!
God has set the standard of how we should love each other. Actually, He IS love. So, we are to love one another, simply from a stance that we are representatives of Christ here on the earth. We have been given the ministry of reconciliation, meaning we have been called to reconcile men back to God by loving them with the love of Christ, not by forcing them to do anything or trying to make them conform to our standards or abide by some checklist. It is the love of God that compels men to seek Him...not force or guilt. Anytime we try to manufacture love by forcing someone to do specific things or guilting them into a conforming behavior, it will not last. Why? Because it's not real or genuine. There's no sincerity or genuine motivation behind it. It's superficial and countefeit.
Just as Christ loves us by choice and not performance, we are to love that same way.
Now I'll admit that this isn't necessarily always the easiest thing to do. Actually, I believe it's a learned behavior. You have to actively practice and resolve in yourself to choose to love every man, just as Christ loves us, even when it's not that easy. I believe that as we allow God to develop character in us, His grace will empower us to love the way He does.
So let's examine some things. What motivates you to do the things you do? Do you behave a certain way because you think that it will make God love you more? When you fail or mess up do you think that God stops loving you? Do you do things only to gain the approval and praise of other people? Do you do things so that others will notice you and speak favorably of you? When people don't react favorably to you or the things that you do, do you feel inadequate or inferior? Really think about what motivates you to do the things you do. Keep in mind...there is nothing you can do or not do to change God, or His ways or the depth of His love.
After answering these questions myself, I discovered that I had been doing a lot of things for people...to gain their approval or favor or attention even. My actions were not motivated by love, but rather by fear and insecurity. I felt I had to measure up to their standards to be loved, accepted and approved. When I didn't do as they desired or didn't measure up to their expectations, and I experienced their outward display of disapproval or rejection, it made me feel unworthy and unloved. What I had to learn was that, first and foremost, the only approval I'll ever need is God's. Period. He fully and completely approves of me already and I didn't have to "do" anything to gain His approval. I simply must accept it. Second, if I spent all of my time and energy pleasing man, seeking man's approval and praise....first of all, I'd be totally screwed up mentally and emotionally. That's just the plain 'ol truth of it! I would literally be unstable and depressed! Secondly, I would actively be placing their importance to me over God's importance to me....Think about it.
As humans, we have an innate desire to feel important and significant in some manner. It's what builds our confidence and our self-esteem. But let's just be honest about this...if we never received one positive comment or form of praise and acceptance from people...does it mean that we are inferior or unacceptable or inadequate? Does it mean we're unimportant or insignificant? Absolutely not! Why? Because the only one who is justifiably worthy of deeming such judgment is God...and as I continue to reiterate, He already approves of us! He loves us with an undying, unfailing, UNCONDITIONAL love! not based on our performance, but based on His choice!
Evidence: II Corinthians 5:21 Amplified Bible
"For our sake He made Christ (virtually) to be sin Who knew no sin, so that in and through Him we might become (endued with, viewed as being in, and examples of) the righteousness of God (what we ought to be, approved and acceptable and in right relationship with Him, by His goodness).
I have really had to take time in prayer and studying to realize the depth of God's love for me. It is so completely opposite of the world's love that I have to constantly be mindful of the difference between the two. I have to meditate on the truth of God's love so that I never have to question or doubt it when I don't exactly "measure up". Am I saying that I can live any kind of way because regardless of what I do, I know God will still love me? That's not what I'm saying at all. There are still consequences for sin, whether it be spiritual or natural. But those consequences don't mean that God no longer loves or accepts us. Sin separates us from God (from close fellowship with Him, not His love). This is why Christ took on our sin so that we might become (or have the opportunity to become) the righteousness of God and be reconciled back to Him. But absolutely nothing....I mean nothing! can separate us from the love of God (Romans 8:38-39).
I mentioned before that God is love. Let's take a look at how the Bible describes what love is like...
I Corinthians 13: 4-8
Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
Love doesn't strut,
Doesn't have a swelled head,
Doesn't force itself on others,
Isn't always "me first,"
Doesn't fly off the handle,
Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn't revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.
Love never dies.
This passage in essence describes the character and nature of God. As ambassadors, this is how we are called to love ourselves and one another, because this is how our Heavenly Father loves us. I challenge you today to take a look at what motivates you. What motivates you to do the things you do? Examine the truth of God's love. Are you living to meet the standards and expectations of men? Or are you living for the sole purpose of representing the love of God on this earth?
-Queen